If you saw me, you’d think that I have eaten one too many slices of pizza or that I am 16 weeks pregnant. It could go either way.
It is true. I am pregnant! Due in August!
We found out in December that we were expecting again, and were completely shocked. We were saturated in privilege and good fortune to conceive again so quickly after the miscarriage, and that our newest zygote was viable enough to become a blastocyst, and then an embryo which developed into a perfectly healthy fetus who is still going strong. We are very lucky. The first few weeks were filled with fear, and I convinced myself that the terrible would happen again at any moment. Though we saw a nice strong heartbeat at our 6 week ultrasound, I was never convinced that it would actually stay that way. I was surprised to learn that nothing bad had happened by 9 weeks, and that our cell-free DNA testing done at 11 weeks determined that the baby was a very low risk (for trisomies 21, 18, and 13) girl. Still, I was certain that it was too good to be true. I was genuinely shocked at our 14 week ultrasound to see a squirming, wiggling, flipping baby — still alive, still thriving. It was incredible. My feelings of fear surrounding the possible impermanence of this pregnancy diminished considerably that day. It seems like she is likely in this for the long haul, and it’s really one of the best feelings in the world.
It’s a tremendous relief to be in the second trimester, not in just having the assuredness of the likelihood that things will go well, but also because I physically feel so much better than I did earlier in the pregnancy.
It looks like everything’s coming up Milhouse.
Alex has been my life ring over the past few months (and really the past 8 years and 11 months), and has gone out of his way to ensure that I am comfortable, heard, and taken care of. He has been my beacon of hope, and has always believed that things would go well this time around. I don’t know what I would have done without his immense confidence. It’s the only thing that allowed me to feel any sense of stability. He has taken on sole cat-duty, attends to Em’s need for overly-rambunctious play, and comes home every evening bearing various snacks and foods that are most appealing on any given day. He has been to every midwife appointment, every ultrasound, and held my hand through it all. I’m so lucky to be married to him.
Now that I feel well again, we’re excited to resume some of our usual activities, and hope we can get in some camping, (mild) hiking, and trips out of the city in the next several months. Despite a couple of nixed pre-baby vacation spots because of Zika virus, we are still dreaming of a bigger vacation at some point before August! We have to devote some more thought to the location, but I’m down for pretty much anywhere that involves me sitting in the sunshine and drinking Shirley Temples. Alex, I hope, will spring for something alcoholic.
We are so hopeful, and so thrilled to share our news. We can’t wait to meet our our daughter this summer!
Hope all is well wherever you are!