28-36 Weeks of Pregnancy in GIFs

July 26, 2016

Once upon a time, I wasn’t pregnant, actually did stuff, and had the motivation to write. These days, I’m super pregnant, have lost most of my physical capability and ability to do much, have little desire to expend what little energy I possess on typing, and spend a lot of time thinking about what is coming around the corner (giving birth to a human). I’m at a loss for what to talk about other than how this whole thing is going, mostly because my options are severely limited. It is difficult, uncomfortable, and painful (for me) to be 9 months pregnant — I can barely do anything but just exist. 

My pregnancy has been uneventful, so not much has changed around here except for the way my body looks and feels, the number of things in our house covered in aluminum foil to keep the cat off, the frequency of my midwife and therapy appointments, and the amount of damage control needed to keep my acid reflux at bay. A lot of how I feel about this whole pregnancy and the various circumstances I’ve been in and encountered since I was last here at 28 weeks can be summed up quite well without a whole lot of words. Plus, using GIFs for communication helps me cope. Here is the shorthand, more entertaining account of the goings on, and various thoughts/feelings associated with being in this stage of pregnancy.

Beginning week 30, my response to questions about how far along I am

When someone asks how pregnancy is going

When I check the calendar for visual confirmation of how much time I’ve got until my due date

Lately, when I’m trying to get up off the floor

Life, after I had just spent the last several weeks successfully avoiding stories about horrible delivery complications

When my therapist, midwives, and doula speak positively about my birth plan (which, seriously, is only to not die)

When someone tells me I am close to my due date but immediately points out that I’m still carrying high, and thus, no where close to being done with my pregnancy

When someone who can still walk without excruciating pelvic pain or can get up from a chair with relative ease tells me about their discomfort

Looking around at all the pregnant women on our birth center tour

When I noticed tons of oxygen tanks in the hallway just as our tour guide pointed out the OR I’d be wheeled into in the event I needed a C-Section

What I heard when I was told I’d be restricted to consuming water, popsicles, and gummy bears during my labor

Learning about yet another thing that can go horribly wrong and kill you in childbirth

When a friend told me she was feeling fat at 10 weeks pregnant

When someone tries to start the medicated vs non-medicated birth conversation for the millionth time

Talking to my therapist about why I dwell on my thoughts about the worst case scenario of childbirth

When I’m leaving therapy

When I’m sitting on the couch watching a movie and it hits me — again — that this birth thing is going down for real

When the soft structured carrier and swing we were going to buy for the baby were discounted on Prime Day

When someone asks me, the person who is heavily pregnant and uncomfortable, if Alex and I intend to have a second kid

When they tell me we “have to” because she “needs” a sibling and “don’t want her to be lonely”

Becoming violently ill at 33 weeks

How I feel about letting our daughter eat any solid food ever after infant CPR class

When I am trying to make an excuse for why, despite my severe pelvic pain, I insist on walking to run errands.

How I felt when I got my sicknsss mostly under control with Zofran

How I’ve adapted as a pregnant woman in her third trimester

Whenever my midwife checks my blood pressure or gets ready to listen to the baby’s heartbeat on the doppler

Meeting with our doula, and talking about pain management techniques for labor

When someone asks me if I’m “ready to pop” or if I’m leaving the house to go have the baby right that second

My main interest these days

When a random person calls me “mama”

Attempting to make adjustments to the car seat

What I tell myself every morning at 2:55 AM

When a friend tells me that I’m going to “rock the hell” out of this childbirth thing

My life’s philosophy now that I’m 9 months along

When another car is parked too close to mine, and I can’t open my door far enough to squeeze my belly out

Trying to comfortably wear my engagement ring now that my hands are swelling

Looking at my pre-pregnancy clothes desperately looking to find something seasonally appropriate that I might be able to squeeze into, saving myself from having to wade through the pitiful selection at the maternity clothing store

How I feel about the next 4-6 weeks:


Oh, and hi:

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